by Dana Cavalea May 21, 2021

1 Comment

Hi Team....

Happy Friday....

These weeks are freakin flying!

I know this one was a productive one for you... so let's wrap it up with some good brain food.

A common theme I have been hearing is based on many not:

1. Feeling heard

2. Getting what they want

3. Feeling misunderstood

These are 3-very common states and are ultimately states that lead to resentment, defensiveness, passive-aggressiveness, and ultimately higher levels of stress and anxiety.

Think of these states leading to a state of permanent tongue biting.

Or, spending too much time living, forecasting, over-thinking, planning, and strategizing good and bad in your head.

Exhausting, right?

Well, I want to tell you this: You can avoid this state completely.

How can I Coach?

Well, it requires you to tell people what you want.


Tell them what you want.

I coach many leaders that are just trying to get the most out of their people.

I coach many people who are just trying to get the most our of themselves and show their leaders what they are capable of.

So, read that again.

As you can see- both ACTUALLY want to get on the same page.

Leaders do not often know how to get the best out of their people because their people never tell them how- so, the leader is left to guess.

Next, the leaders do not often articulate well EXACTLY what they want- and deliver that message in a way that is clear, concise, and with the right tonality to their people.

Now, since both parties want to be on the same page- let's get them there.

Leaders need to ask their people "what is the best way to manage" them....

Those being led can really help the leader out by telling that leader "the best way to manage" them...

Say you are somebody that needs constant challenge, enjoys aggressive tonality, and likes to be evaluated on your performance monthly- you must tell your leader this.

Say as a leader, you appreciate your people when they do not assume something if they are not clear- but rather ask instead of guess- you must tell them this.

Most workplace and team dynamics suffer because there is a lack of openness and flat out telling people what you need and want.

As a result, there is a lot of fear, guessing, and projecting.

That never works.

Remember:  Both parties want to win.

And, both parties need to be open... but remember, delivery is key.

How you deliver a message, the tone you use, the words you use, and the intent you use is super important.

When you master the "ask and tell"- you will be amazed at just how liberating and connecting it is for all involved.

Now, go put it into play.

Let's go...

Your Coach,


**New Podcast: 7-Reasons "WHY" Most Leaders Suck and Fail.

Click here to listen. You are going to enjoy this one!

Dana Cavalea
Dana Cavalea

Dana Cavalea is the World Champion Director of Strength and Conditioning & Performance of the New York Yankees. Currently, he is a High Performance Speaker & Consultant to Pro Athletes, Entrepreneurs, Business Executives, and Workforces on lifestyle strategies to reduce stress, improve work/life integration, and most importantly improve daily performance /outcomes. Book Dana to Speak at your Company Event or Conference Today!

1 Response


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