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Hi Team...
Well, today we are going against the grain...
We are going to smack many "gurus" in the face...
Because what I am about to share may stun some people... but, it must be said..
Ready?
There is not such thing as balance... and every high performer knows it....
I have never worked with a high performer that ever achieved balance.
In fact, it is their lack of balance that makes them special, an outlier, somebody who thinks differently...
These are the people who take weekend trips to Europe, weeklong vacations to Africa, and have figured out how to condense the World, not because they seek balance but because they seek excitement...
They LOVE chasing deals...
They LOVE the chance at an opportunity...
They LOVE the feeling of victory
**key word is LOVE (when you love what you do- balance is not needed- learning to manage a schedule that makes the important things a priority is needed. Those important things all must be scheduled.)
I believe how you live and how you process comes down to not only how you think, but how you are wired....
And to coach somebody in a way that forces a "Rewire" could have very harsh consequences...
Think about it like this- somebody is naturally high strung, has a manic personality, and is a true visionary....
Now, you are asking them to relax.... to rest.... to listen to the sound of a Buddhist rubbing the rim of a glass for sound therapy....
It often has very negative consequences because that is extreme to that high-strung somebody...
I have found the recipe for a high performer is not balance- but, it is schedule management, permission for free thought, and, making sure they have a sounding board fully available to them for max expression, in-moment dialogue, and a person in place to help them process their wild ideas and thoughts...
Processing these thoughts and aligning them to their next action is one of the most calming things a high performer can do- more so than what is often a high stress meditation or float therapy session....
Now, for some, they love meditation and that is wonderful.....
But, for the extreme personalities...
My advice to them is always "Stay Extreme"... and play the extremes but get your schedule right so you do not feel overwhelmed, OUT OF CONTROL, pressurized, and that you are cutting your family short...
How balance is defined in the corporate space and business space today is very unrealistic....
It is what is giving way to a lack of work, a lack of push, and a lack of serious business...
Because the definition of balance in these spaces is translated to: Don't work OR Less work.
But it is work that provides purpose, satisfaction (when doing what you love), and a sense of self while being a part of something bigger than self...
All positive things.
So, instead of seeking balance through doing less, schedule vacations and long weekends throughout the year.....
Cut out early here and there when you just do not feel creative and inspired...
Get off the technology as often as you can to stay fresh....
Learn to manage your daily schedule making it as effective as possible.
But realize allocating 4 hours of your day to working out, breathing, relaxing, bathing, soaking, massage may not actually give you, the high performer the peace you seek....
Peace comes from alignment...
Peace and the feeling of being under control (which is really what the feeling of balance is the sense of) comes from "clearing the mechanism" and feeling understood to yourself....
When you are clear and your thoughts feel aligned to your next action and the bigger picture- peace emerges...
This is the way of the high performer...
To tell them to NOT think about business, to NOT think about their next move, to NOT think about growth, and to NOT have just a slight bit of nervousness is an absolutely terrible formula- because it is impossible.
Every competitor in business knows "turning it off" when there is deal in the works OR a big presentation that has to be had can be almost impossible- so instead of "turning it off", deal with the thoughts that go with it- rather than working to make them non-existent...
I speak about this because I see it daily on the front line coaching these individuals...the high performers.
And I let them know from the start of our relationship: My job is not to sterilize you and kill your spirit- it is to empower you to GO for what it is you want....
But to go after it in the most efficient, organized, methodical way that aligns WITH you personality and ways- as opposed to trying to remake you into something you are not....
Be careful that you are not trying to remake yourself.....
Improve yourself, ALWAYS- but working to become somebody else can be very dangerous and costly...
Again, when you get all of the above right, you will not feel balanced- but under control which is what every high performer really wants.
Let's go!
Your Coach,
COACH DANA CAVALEA
